As one also entranced by darkness I will make a few notes and pose a few questions for you also OP
>>115686
To do what you call a "ritual of assimilation", I feel it is necessary to understand what the human mind is and how it functions. What we often consider our consciousness (or at least less magickally minded people might), is nothing more than our ego. A pointless mess of attachments and identifications serving to give our existence a more solid footing. That is to to, the ego serves as a way for people to understand themselves. Our "true" existence, so to speak, our soul, is beyond human comprehension.
What this means is that the human mind, the ego, does not need to attempt to understand the processes of it's soul or magick. Instead, what needs to happen, is for the ego to be changed in such a way as to support the workings of it's soul, or magick. We hold an intense amount of energy in us, and if we attempt to use magick and the ego is not arranged properly, all sorts of things can occur, the most probable of which is failure.
Think of it like this: Your soul is electricity, your ego are circuits and wires, and your reality is whatever the machine called you outputs. If the circuits are poorly or improperly made, you lose a lot of energy on objectively pointless things, and the output is all messed up.
>>115705
To me it sounds like your fear is a prominent feature of your life. I feel that maybe that feeling of destiny was simply a fear that you made reality?
>>115706
You must be the stonger mind, I cannot stress this enough. In fact you ARE the stronger mind (assuming you have not found some way to re-split yourself by now (at least from your perspective)). If a merger happened, you are ONE! You are the stronger mind! There is only one, split in two, the human and the eternal, and my guides tell me that if all goes well in time even that can fade away to a simple one mind through and through. If you feel that weaker (human) mind speak, understand that it is the ego. It is a reflection of the circuits you have built inside you. You know better than it, learn to handle it. It can be done easily and he will even thank you for it.
I wish to stress to anyone that hasn't done anything like this that such a process is VERY dangerous, and can lead to death (suicide and heart failure both being possibilities). There are much, much, much gentler and nicer ways to open yourself to your divinity. I still struggle to understand this process but it is essentially a controlled destruction and reconstruction of your psyche. It will rock your fucking world I promise you. Its fucking dangerous, but it is also the quickest way to access your occult powers from my understanding, and if you have more than a fair bit of grit, and a sadomasochistic side it can even be enjoyable.
>>115693
Good points. I suspect that merging with another soul is highly unlikely (though I have heard more than my fair share of such stories), more likely I feel is that if any "merger" is occurring it is happening between a persons lower and higher minds.