I want to improve myself. 12/02/17 (Sat) 06:57:03 No. 112329
Hi /fringe/! I want to make myself better. I want to leave my rut and be useful for once.
I had many past lives and I think it did make me more powerful, but I'm afraid failure and change and I don't believe in myself at all so I'm not very talented. I had done very crazy stuff in the past and I never loss power.
Psychics I talked too keep saying I can help people and I do have a lot of latent potential, but they also say my selfishness, anxiety, and lack self-confidence hurt me a lot and it holds me back.
I feel anxiety over everything and I don't see any other option besides killing myself. I may cursed. I felt this way forever. Why am I like this? Someone did say that people with a lot of past lives will go though a lot of challenges.
I don't want to submit anymore.
____________________________
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12/02/17 (Sat) 07:32:37 No. 112330
YouTube embed. Click thumbnail to play. >>112329
Basic wizardy:
Change your posture for at least 2 minutes whenever you feel like shit.
Amy Cuddy tedtalk,
https://youtu.be/Ks-_Mh1QhMc
Deep Trance Identification
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Deep_trance_identification
Keep at it until something changes, don't just "try" it once.
If you want radical change use Tyler Durden and one of the Joker persona's.
David Snyder has good videos on energy work. Basics are that you use nlp methods but also incorporate your body. You see an image of a feeling or state you like or dislike, point to where you feel it in your body, then point to the image with your other hand to where it is outside your body. Then you manipulate it, and reincorporate it into your system. Can result in dramatic change. Same advice as deep trance, don't just "try" it and then say it doesn't work. That's just your old self trying to prolong its existence. Everything wants to survive.
good luck
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12/02/17 (Sat) 10:36:51 No. 112343
>>112329
I tell this to everyone that's suicidal, ask your doctor to put you on testosterone brother. It'll give you a new found confidence and drive to do things. It's life changing. Please consider this before actually committing suicide.
rule 2, but i won't tell if you won't
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12/03/17 (Sun) 15:50:30 No. 112374
>>112330
Not OP but could you go into Deep trance Identification some more? That Wikipedia article is good and I'd be curious to hear more
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12/03/17 (Sun) 17:23:02 No. 112376
>>112374
I know just what I've read and picked up on over the years. I'm not a hypnotist though.
Also I'm guilty of the "try it once" disease, which is why I made such a point about that. These are tested things, but they do take a lot of work. Well, not so much with the posture thing, that is pretty straight forward.
You imagine someone that has the qualities you would like to have. You do this in a daydream. Try to incorporate all of your senses into this daydream, visual, the way stuff feels, the smell of things. Then you can either walk into the other person, or float down into their body. See what they see, feel what they feel. The more detail you put into it the greater the effect.
I'd advise using a qualified hypnotist who has some experience with this if you have the resources for it. But you should get results just by doing it as a daydream because that is a trance state. The key to success in all of these things magical and mental is doing it like martial arts practice. Repetition creates muscle memory. In this case its muscles of the unseen kind.
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12/04/17 (Mon) 12:09:15 No. 112398
>>112329
You can improve yourself, you can become happy. There is only one barrier. ONE THING IS STOPPING YOU.
Yourself.
The greatest curse of the millennial age is that our youth have been conditioned to be weak and useless.
They have no purpose, no drive, no willpower. There is no faith in any modern western institution anymore - marriage, careers, religion or patriotic feelings. They are all rudderless, wandering in the dark.
The only person who can lead you out of the darkness, is yourself - but the real kicker is that your whole upbringing has made you weak, so you cannot even do this.
Quote from elsewhere that I read today :
>I've yet to have a single case where the kid actually took up arms against his situation.
>I can now say that in most cases, young men being in a shit position is their own deliberate, conscious, self doing.
Now, I can give you some tips, on how to get a backbone and start taking fucking control. But, I think you will give up after a few days and go back to your vidya, chemicals and masturbation.
Will you?
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12/04/17 (Mon) 14:38:37 No. 112401
>>112398
>Now, I can give you some tips, on how to get a backbone and start taking fucking control.
But I need a backbone to even start using these tips.
>But, I think you will give up after a few days and go back to your vidya, chemicals and masturbation.
I can't count how many times I tried and this happened. Not OP btw
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12/04/17 (Mon) 15:56:22 No. 112402
YouTube embed. Click thumbnail to play. >>112401
Define what having a backbone would be for you. What it would look like. What kind of person you imagine you would look like. Fantasize about it. A lot.
Write it down. Change it around. Keep fantasizing about it. What would it look like if you were being transformed into that. Imagine that power entering you, changing you. Keep fantasizing about it every waking moment.
Make a sigil that represents your fantasy. Just doodle out some design. Keep doodling the same design whenever you have the opportunity. Don't tell anyone what it means.
Never stop.
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12/04/17 (Mon) 18:32:55 No. 112405
>>112402
>What it would look like. What kind of person you imagine you would look like
I have no idea. My imagination barely works, my thoughts are very abstract, even when I dream at night I don't really 'see' things. I got no creativity. My head feels under pressure and games and internet are constantly on my mind. Drawing the sigil sounds interesting but it's pointless without focusing on the intention
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12/04/17 (Mon) 19:43:06 No. 112406
YouTube embed. Click thumbnail to play. >>112405
>I got no creativity.
>My head feels under pressure and games and internet are constantly on my mind
These two statements are at odds with one another. It's the same part of your mind at work in both cases. The only problem you have is that you're used to using your creative mind to appreciate other people's creativity, rather than your own.
Release yourself from the need to succeed, on the first try or at all. Recognize that you are but one moment along a continual path through all lives. What you learn in this life will be used in the next, so there is no true "failure". Just some mistakes that you learn from sooner, and some that you learn from later.
You are a smaller part of a larger "soul group", united in death but separated in life. There may be people you are drawn to in life who you recognize an unconscious affinity for, these are members of your soul group that you are separated from (another "hand" of the same "body", if that helps make sense of it).
Nobody is at the same stage in their journey as you are, which is why the only person in your way is as >>112398 said, yourself. Don't expect to succeed overnight, it's a gradual process. You will live every version of every day before this is all over, so focus on the small changes as every day repeats. Find one small thing that bothers you and is in your power to change: Make your bed in the morning, or spend two minutes sitting in a chair with your own thoughts.
You probably heard in school that your brain is a muscle, you use it or lose it, and that is true for every part of your brain. It's not that you're not creative, it's that your mental muscles have atrophied from lack of use.
Nobody starts out benching 300 pounds, and most experienced trainers will tell you to focus on your form before you try to focus on your gains. The same applies to your mind. Read a book, even if it's a short piece of light fiction. Don't "tear a tendon" trying to force yourself to read Ulysses, just pick something that interests you. Once you have the habit formed, then focus on modifying it to suit you better.
And remember that failure is okay. Yes, jerking off is (generally speaking) bad for you, yes, porn and video games are terrible for you. But if you can go from watching porn 3x a day to 1x a day, that's an improvement. If you can resist jerking off for 3 days, focus on the success compared to your past, not on how you failed after "only" three days… It's three more than you did last week. Don't dwell on the two weeks you went without cleaning your room. Focus on the feeling of pride after you did, and crave that feeling more often, just like you crave bad habits now.
Cold turkey rarely works. As you taper off from video games, you'll naturally feel drawn towards other activities. Until that time, don't waste all of your willpower trying to "not play video games", because then you're fighting a battle every time you're not. Instead, say "I'll play a round after I've done laundry", for example, so that when you sit down to do it, it's guilt free enjoyment. If you truly want these changes to happen, they will happen, there's no need to rush them.
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12/04/17 (Mon) 19:45:41 No. 112407
>>112406
Another way of expressing this thought here that I heard a while ago and will now repeat:
Pretend for a moment that this is the "second draft" of your life. Pretend that you've already done all of this before, every mistake you've made. You have the power to change them, but you're not going to change them all, and you might make new mistakes on the way. It's all part of the process, you'll do better on the third draft.
You have the power to free yourself from your own expectations. If you did not have this power previously, I grant it to you now.
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12/04/17 (Mon) 20:45:12 No. 112408
>>112406
>>112407
I don't have enough self control, I now realize I'm not going to do or change anything, just thinking about it makes me sick. I guess I don't even want to improve myself or even know what that means, I shouldn't have said anything.
Progress, mistakes, failure, success, none of these things make sense to me anymore. Paths, souls, all this mysticism..All I see is animals dying, killing and eating each other and I can't comprehend how can anyone see something more.
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12/05/17 (Tue) 02:56:34 No. 112414
>>112408
Most likely, you are a victim of overpopulation and mass extinction.
What many call "normies" or "NPCs" are in fact animal souls that were forced to reincarnate as humans too early.
It's possible you are one of these souls and aware enough to sense something is wrong, but still struggling with realizing the scope of it all. That view you described
>.All I see is animals dying, killing and eating each other
sounds very much like it to me. Please realize I don't mean this as an insult, we all spent time in the reincarnation cycle as various animals. Your posts just have led me to believe that perhaps you reincarnated before you were ready.
I can only emphasize that you shouldn't need to worry. If you truly were not ready for human life, when you die, you will not be forced into a human body again until you are ready. If you do something, you were meant to do it.
Don't burden yourself with "why", the "why" becomes apparent in time. The "what" is more than enough challenge. The mysticism may well be too much for you, so just find something to occupy your time that is not too much. Maybe learn to code or garden, or something to that effect. If you know something is too much for you to handle, don't worry about it.
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12/05/17 (Tue) 07:40:53 No. 112417
>>112406
I'm kind of giving up on the idea of finding happiness in this life.
Is it okay to just focus on self-improvement in the hope that the lessons I learn here will bleed over into my next one?
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12/05/17 (Tue) 14:09:43 No. 112424
>>112417
I believe that's the sort of question that if you ask, you already know.
My own answer would be "yes, but it depends on what". If you can find some version of the Henry Ford reincarnation interview (see image), it may help.
Take my example of gardening (it's a very useful skill for nearly everyone, even a rich-ass motherfucker should know enough to judge the gardener he hires). What you learn in this life will bleed over into the next as a "knack for it".
This goes both ways, by the way. Bad habits in this life may be a result of traumatic experiences in the past. A tendency to overeat may stem from starving to death in a previous life, or a fear of commitment might stem from a past life where you were cheated on. I cannot claim to have the answers for these problems if they're the case, I am still learning.
>happiness
Happiness is slowly becoming a dirty word in my view. Happiness, anger, sadness, ecstasy, they're all fleeting. Nobody on this earth walks around feeling happy 24/7. In fact, some mystic people call this state of mind "blissed out", from spending too much time in an elevated state of mind and not enough grounded to the earth. You're walking around on cloud 9 so much that you're perfectly content when your house is taken away because you didn't pay the bills, so you don't do shit about it. It's not a healthy way to live.
I think the happiness-focus is primarily a product of advertising, FWIW. "Buy this and you'll have this life, and then you'll be happy".
Instead of happiness, I would focus on contentment. You do not need to be happy all the time to be content. A common practice for cultivating this mindset is a "gratitude list", which is a good thing for a morning ritual/prayer. Think of a few things (common choice is 5) that you are thankful for. Some examples that are often on my list:
>A roof over my head
>food in my belly
>pets and family that love me unconditionally
>warm clothes
>hot, running water
Though I said that happiness is a dirty word earlier, I'm going to be a hypocrite here and paraphrase/quote something I heard when I learned this practice: "If you can't be happy with what you have, what makes you sure that you'll be happy with what you want?".
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12/05/17 (Tue) 14:09:43 No. 112425
>>112417
>I'm kind of giving up on the idea of finding happiness in this life.
Did you watch the cuddy tedtalk?
All you have to do is find a picture of someone who looks like you want to feel, then assume their posture and count to at least 120.
How hard is that?
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12/05/17 (Tue) 14:23:38 No. 112426
>>112425
I watched it and appreciated it, for what it's worth. My favorite pose to emulate is the gorilla picture she showed. :)
I really want to show that video to my mother, too. She suffers from a TBI she had in childhood, so cuddy's story about a car accident dropping her IQ really hit home. I think it will help my mom a lot, because brain damage is one of those things that I think only other brain injury sufferers can truly understand/empathize with. All the whole-brain advice in the world can only go so far.
>How hard is that?
I understand what you're saying but please also understand how it comes across. When you're at the bottom of the pit, even easy tasks seem difficult because they sound pointless. Anyone outside of the pit can tell you they've been in the pit and climbed out, but from inside of the pit it sounds hollow.
It always begins with one step, which for some people might be the posture change. For other people it might be taking a shower or brushing their teeth. For someone else it might be lying to their pot dealer and saying they're broke 'til next week so they can't get their supply. On the one hand, you're right, it's not hard, but on the other hand… We're not in the pit anymore.
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12/05/17 (Tue) 14:55:20 No. 112427
>>112401
>But I need a backbone to even start using these tips.
>>112405
>My imagination barely works
>>112408
>I don't have enough self control
You guys are proving my first point - That you are your own worst enemy.
Stop now, and examine what you just said very carefully. In the context of cause and effect, what effect, does the cause of saying this line to yourself do?
This itself, is the key to all self-change.
This guy
>>112402
gets it btw - and no, you already have all you need to be effective. "my imagination barely works" Stop now!, and refer to what I said above.
>I can't count how many times I tried and this happened. Not OP btw
The thing about any "technique" or "method" to improving yourself is… this is something that every one of you people who have failed them have to realize … All these "exercises" are not something you do a few times to change yourself. No.
When you start going to the gym (for example) you don't go for 3 or 6 months, and mission accomplished. No. You go to the gym, then you never stop going. It becomes a part of who you are. YOU DO IT EVERY DAY.
The magus does his rituals and meditation every fucking morning (and afternoon as well probably)
That is why you weak kids fail, because getting a pet is easier than this.
There is a solution though. Like that guy who gets it says…
You use your mind against itself. This is basically what most of the occult is.
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12/05/17 (Tue) 18:26:21 No. 112432
>>112405
how often do you masturbate anon? and would you tell us how old are you?
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12/05/17 (Tue) 20:12:15 No. 112435
>>112432
2x a day maybe. 24. But that doesn't have much to do with it. In my teen years I started avoiding everyone and everything, got addicted to video games and all these years of braindead repetitive activities turned me into a vegetable. I wasn't born like this, so this being an npc thing >>112414 doesn't sound right to me.
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12/05/17 (Tue) 21:04:00 No. 112436
>>112435
>But that doesn't have much to do with it.
Yes it does. 2x a day is normal for a teenager going through puberty. For an adult, it's excessive. 2-3 times a week is more normal for your age, maybe 5 if you have an ultra-high libido.
Your sexuality should have slowed down by now, but your habits haven't changed. Stop for 3 days and then notice how much more cum and how much better it feels the next time you do it and you'll see what I mean.
It sounds to me really like your mental muscles have just atrophied and you don't want to start working them out for the same reason most people don't want to start working their physical muscles out.
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12/05/17 (Tue) 22:03:36 No. 112437
>>112435
I did it 1-2x a day until I was 26. It was awful. I got so much better when i stopped.
Or if you wanna keep doing it, at least read the multi orgasmic man and/or cultivating male sexual energy by mantak chia
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12/06/17 (Wed) 04:50:06 No. 112448
Thank you everyone!
>>112330
I watched the tedtalk and I tried having good posture the whole time I watched it.
>>>112343
I will, but I did hear it's hard to get. Got any vitamins or something to use while I wait.
>>112398
>Now, I can give you some tips, on how to get a backbone and start taking fucking control. But, I think you will give up after a few days and go back to your vidya, chemicals and masturbation.
It can't hurt to try. Worst things happened to me and I did give up two things that only gave me anxiety that I had for a long time.
>>112402
The sigil part seems very interesting. I also have a personality I suppress because I don't people would like it. Is it okay to combine my hidden personality and my goal personality on the sigil?
>>112406
I really like this post.
>>112414
>>112424
I think I abused in a past life and still feel their pain. Psychics say they feel that I was abused and they a lot of other things right and I wasn't in this life. They said I internalize the pain as self-hatred.
>>112432
>>112435
>>112437
I don't have a problem with this, thank God.
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12/06/17 (Wed) 06:17:32 No. 112454
>>112448
>I watched the tedtalk and I tried having good posture the whole time I watched it.
>It can't hurt to try.
OK. Please read the second point of my 2nd post ;
>>112427
Whatever you do, don't just 'try' it.
Like master yoda says, there is no try, there is only do.
You must do it so it becomes a permanent part of your life, that is the only way it will change you.
Like the greatest boxer (see attached picture) was fond of saying at every opportunity - "I am the greatest!" He knew what that was doing to himself.
I recommend starting with this feller. If you can ignore (or not get affected by the fact) that he likes to use the bible as supporting material, his exercises are extremely powerful and (I know from personal experience) that they work quite well.
http://www.realneville.com/text_archive.htm
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12/08/17 (Fri) 17:41:43 No. 112515
>>112454
Thank you! I have doing the positive affirmations thing and I do feel better.
Also to: >>112414 My imagination does work so I can't be a soul that jumped in the cycle. Forgot to tell you that.
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04/13/18 (Fri) 14:04:25 No. 118704
OP I've been posting this in threads or in reply to posts for people who I really think need it.
https://mewch.net/fringe/res/2736.html
hope you feel better.
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04/13/18 (Fri) 15:08:44 No. 118720
>>112329
Several things for you to think about:
1. confidence comes from practice, and all of life is practice. Practise things, stick with them, persevere and become good at them, you will gain confidence in them and in general.
2. if you do not want to submit anymore, you must fight, and never stop fighting.
fight against the sloth, the fear, the hesitation, the doubt. when you hear it whispering to you to lie down, or stay in bed, or any away from something that you want to do, or need to do, then shout at it, punch it right in the face and stand up and start doing that thing.
every time you do it, you will become better at fighting, against yourself, your self doubt, and against the world, nature, and negative people. you will develop your inner fighter over time.
Think about those two things, and over time they will make more sense. But you must apply them, daily, across all activities, and you will understand them.
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04/13/18 (Fri) 15:37:10 No. 118727
harmony is made to look like chaos.
harmony and balance exist without chaos, but chaos does not exist without balance and harmony to support it.
without harmony to create a balanced order that can continue reacting passionately, there is no chaos.
There is no strength or weakness without power.
There is no fear or courage without strength and weakness.
There is ignorance in the strong fighting the weak if the weak are good.
There is ignorance in the weak fighting the strong if the strong are good.
There is ignorance in believing that good is the same for everyone.
There is no dark or light, ying or yang; there is only God.
There is no rulebook or religions; there is only God.
Read through corruption; Read through wisdom; distill the drops of truth, distill the drops of yourself.
doubt not and despair not; instead only fearless and unbreakable faith.
there is no serenity and peace without passion and emotion; without caring about something, there is no reason to do or not do.
imperfection is a lie. There is only Perfection.
There is no life or death, there is only God.
Through God There is always potential to grow and improve.
Through God I am guided on the path.
Through following the path I gain improvement.
Through improvement I grow.
Through growth I gain knowledge.
Through knowledge I gain wisdom.
Through wisdom I perceive the truth.
perceive the truth; perceive God.
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04/13/18 (Fri) 17:29:27 No. 118735
>>112330
>don't just "try" it and then say it doesn't work
>That's just your old self trying to prolong its existence. Everything wants to survive.
>good luck
That resonated with me
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04/13/18 (Fri) 22:06:57 No. 118742
>>112329
You are wracked with doubt. Do you often feel pins and needles? As gay and and as cliche as it sounds you need to have faith in yourself and believe in yourself. Do what you want to do, this will set you on a healthier path.
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04/14/18 (Sat) 00:58:54 No. 118745
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05/23/18 (Wed) 14:47:24 No. 120425
FYI: Defeatism PSYOPs look identical to this thread.
> "Help, I'm such a fucking looser"
< "Here's all these easy as shit things to try."
> "Oh, I'm too much of a pathetic shit to do it, but I'll waste more time shitting up the board with defeatism."
Since the reader often identifies with the subject this places an icon of psychological pain in the mind, the weaker minded will adopt the defeatism.
I want demotivation shills & attention seeking whores to leave.
If (psy)OP wasn't a complete faggot they'd be posting about recent attempts at self improvement progress…
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